The Path to finding my Life Purpose (Part 1)

"All roads lead to Rome, but What is MY Rome?"

Growing up in a highly logical environment where financial well-being takes precedence over all else, it was inevitable that if anyone was academically inclined, he/she would be subject to the societal anticipation to join the cohort of professionals such as doctors and lawyers (as they were deemed the highest fee earners at that juncture of my growing up).

Even worse is that because of the collective consciousness ingrained in us (and therefore me), we (including me) would mistakenly assume that such expectations are our own ambition and deepest desires.

Therefore, not surprisingly, my choice of vocation when I selected my course of study at University, was law. The praises I garnered from family members (even from those who had deemed me simple minded as a child) were certainly gratifying...but short-lived.

Because even from early teenage days, there was always a niggling feeling embedded within me that something wasn't right, this life of studying hard, getting a good job, marrying, having kids, then dying. What was the point of living ? It seemed quite senseless to me.

And so, even when I landed my first job with one of the most prestigious law firms in Singapore upon graduation (again earning me applauds from those around and yet again only providing me a fleeting sense of achievement), that ball of unease, of non-fulfillment seated deep within me, never went away.

As a result, I started on my path to discover the purpose of life, from reading about different religions, to participating in various new age courses such as Reiki, Angel Mediumship/Channeling, Tarot and Oracle readings, Bazi, etc., even to the extent of undertaking a meditation retreat in a nunnery high on a hill in Nepal.

The experiences were indeed wondrous, and at various points, I managed to break out from corporate life temporarily.

I was featured for my Reiki healing in a local magazine and was filmed in a local documentary on alternative healing. Surprisingly, I also received a request from the magazine to participate in exploring a "ghost house" during the Lunar 7th month. And although I turned down this request, still it was satisfying as a validation of my "other" sensory abilities.

Yet somehow, those intermissions (no matter how interestingly paranormal they were) never had any staying power, because I still hadn't realized what I truly yearned for, or was meant to do in this lifetime...